 Photo # 19 | # 1 Caption: Katherine, "Why did I marry such an idiot? The only reason Wolsey organized this wreastling match is so he could check out Henry's tight butt." Submitted by: Boudica | # 2 Caption:
Catherine of aragon"think un sexy thoughts Katherine, think UN sexy thoughts"
Henry: "i am highly pissed off right now, but damn i bet I look fine"
Wolsey: "mmm hmmm" "oops did i say that out loud?"
Submitted by:howardfan | # 3 Caption:Kof A whispers
"EnnRee... if you win I will come to your chamberz tonight and teeckle you with the feather in my headpiece again.....you know how much you like that!" "you will also get 2 servings of pudding, after you service me first, of course..." LOL!
Submitted by:FMFJRMGRL | # 4 Caption: "...and then Orlando Bloom ripped off his shirt and shouted, 'Bring it on!' It was really cool. All the ladies loved him. Am I doing it right? Do I look impressive? Maybe a bit more Elvis lip..."
Submitted by: queen_elizabeth_1533 | # 5
HOST (offscreen): ...and now we come to our final bachelor of the evening, Bachelor Number Five. Bachelor Number Five holds down a steady and very well paying job as King of England, now he hopes to be King of your heart. An outdoorsman at heart, Bachelor Number Five enjoys horse riding, hunting, jousting and archery but he has a soft, romantic side too, like a little fluffy marshmallow...
HENRY: I am not a marshmallow!
HOST: Quiet, you! May I start the bidding a one hundred pounds? Who'll bid one hundred pounds for this fine, handsome young man? Anybody? Did I mention that he's the King of England? No takers... How about fifty pounds? Can I get fifty pounds for him? This is for charity, ladies, for a very worthy cause... can't remember which, exactly...
KATHERINE: The relief fund for the families of people wrongly executed by Bachelor Number Five.
HOST: I see... Ten pounds then, do I hear ten pounds?
(Complete and utter silence from the ladies in the audience)
*Half an hour later*
HENRY: How long do I have to stand here?
HOST: Ssh! I always sell every single one of my bachelors and you're not going to break my record! How about a shilling, ladies? One measly little shilling? It's not like you'll have to date him, or anything. You can put him to work cleaning your gutters.
HENRY (through gritted teeth): Take part in the auction, she said. It's for a good cause, she said. Won't it be great when you make ten times as much money as King Francis does, she said. Anne promised that she'd bid for me if I went through with this!
KATHERINE (smirks): Anne really should have known better than to accept any drink I handed to her. Silly girl.
HENRY: You didn't...
KATHERINE: I did. Give her a few hours to sleep it off - chances are you'll still be standing there, waiting for somebody to make a bid, when she wakes up.
HOST (almost in tears): Hasn't anybody got a penny to spare? Or maybe a brooch or something that they'd like to trade? Anything?
LADIES IN AUDIENCE: NO!!!!
Submitted by: Holly2 | # 6 Caption:
Katherine: Henry, my darling, i wish you would give this up.
Henry: But I want to be a bachelor in The Bachelor Competition, and besides, none of the competitors have abs like mine.
Katherine: But dearest, you are not a bachelor!!
Henry: Well I could be if Wolsey would get off his duff and secure me a divorce.
Submitted by: offwithherhead | # 7 Katherine: Oh yeah Henry I forgot to tell you that you were out with Anne Boleyn I was shagging your dear friend Thomas More
Henry: WHAT?! WITH SIR THOMAS! OH HELL NO! OF ALL PEOPLE *rips off Shirt* I'LL KICK HIS HUMANIST ASS!
Submitted: Clumsyxheart
| # 8 Caption:
Whilst admiring Henry's impressive butt, Katherine solemnly admitted to herself that his new school shorts were too small, and she would return them to marks and spencers tomorrow to change them for the bigger size of age 5 to 6.
Submitted by: Neveleo | |
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